Tuesday’s Top Ten: 10 Tips for Women Deer Hunters
Introducing “Tuesday’s Top Ten!” echo, echo, echo. I’m going to give this a try for a couple of weeks and see how it goes. The top ten could be any number of things…top ten quilting tips, top ten vegetables and fruits you should grow, top ten deer recipes, top ten ways to potty train…it could go on and on…so let’s get started.
If you are a guy I’d love for you to read this post but I just heard there are some great deals over at The BassPro Shop. Several pages of clearance items. AND, the new 2011 Catalog is out! So, skip on over and check out their website. Don’t forget to come back another day and check out my hubby’s grilling magic!
Ladies, we’re friends right? Now that it’s just us, I know I can trust you to keep these tips and tricks in your pocket, right? Shake your head yes. Very good. You have to pinky promise, you won’t share or tell guys about these Top 10 Hunting Tips. Now that we’ve gotten that taken care of we are all sister for life. Let’s get down to work….
In our family, to be taken seriously as a female hunter you have to be able to do two things. 1. Clock as many hours in as the guys. 2. Shoot and hit. The shooting takes practice and patience but you will get it. Now, why is the time clock such a problem? Well, A. We don’t like the cold. B. We get bored easily. C. We can’t hold our pee.
So for my first “Tuesday’s Top Ten,” series, I’m going to share some top secret hunting tips for us girls….some you might be familiar with, others you might think are crazy…either way I hope you can take something from the list and prove to the boys that girls rock!! The secret to this is making sure they don’t find out about your tips & tricks. What they don’t know won’t hurt them and in the process you’ll earn their respect while havin’ a little fun.
1. Invest in hand, foot and body warmers.
1a. Send your hubby to McDonald’s Playland with the kids for ice cream or out to the barn while you get ready.
1b. To keep the menfolk from cacklin’ about how you couldn’t stay out there because it was too cold (and to keep you out there)….the first step is to grab one of your microwaveable warming pouches used for keeping food warm at potlucks. Warm it up as warm as your microwave allows. Stuff it nonchalantly into your hand muff warmer thingy. Cute, huh?
2. I hate to suggest spending money but I highly recommend these shirts and pants called Cuddle Buddies. Great for keeping warm in a drafty, 120 year old home and perfect for your first layer of hunting clothing…double layers of long-underwear will work too.
3. Layer, layer, layer, baby! Start with a turtle neck (I think they still make them) then the Cuddle Buddies followed by long-underwear, fleece lounge pants, overalls**, followed by a hooded sweatshirt – this is your back up warmth pouch, winter coat***, orange sweatshirt with hood. Before zipping your coat tie on the hand muff, see #7, then cover the muff with coat. The coat will help preserve the heat.
4. Toe Warmers!! This is a pretty common one. I like to use three pairs at a time. Used correctly and with ample coverage your toes will be nice and toasty for hours. First, begin with a regular pair of boot socks. Remove the adhesive from the bottoms and stick them to the bottom of your feet. Next, put on a good pair of insulated outdoor socks – the guys won’t have a clue you’ve got extra warmth going on. Next, prepare your boots. Take the second pair of toe warmers and adhere them inside, on the top of your boot, above your toes. Finally, place the third pair on the bottom as intended. Depending on your warmth level you could leave out the first pair. It just depends on how well your toes handle the cold. Mine do not fair well…thus, the three pairs of warmers.
5. Body Ache Warmers – I can think of the brand name but they advertise there products for relieving pain. You can adhere the patch right to your Cuddle Buddies, near your lower back. This will also help to keep you calm and relaxed while waiting for your harvest.
6. Your Head – Another area that cries, “let’s go in, please, please!!” Begin with a fleece headband/ear cover. Use a hand warmer and place it in the top of a regular stocking cap. Then cover with your blaze orange stocking hat. If you get too warm you can always take the first one off.
7. Your neck – For your neck we will use a multi-use tool. Find some scrap fabric or go to the clearance area of your local fabric store. You’ll only need 1/4 of a yard. Fold the fabric in half and cut 5 inches wide. If you sew, sew each side, reinforce the bottom which should still be a fold, leave the top open. Measure 20 inches and cut the remaining off of the open end. If you do not sew, have no fear. You can use a hot glue gun or purchase the no-sew products from Walmart, Target or sewing store. Find yourself about 5-6 cups of corn or enough to fill your sack. Fold the open ends in and sew or glue shut. Reinforce with a second stitch. Now you have your own neck warmer. Just microwave for 30 sec. until you find your desired temp. Try to preserve the heat by placing the warmer under your hooded sweatshirt, use your bibs to keep it in place and then coat.
**Side note: Use 1/2 yd. and make two. On your second one place small droplets of lavender oil or a citrus oil to help relax or revitalized your body.
8. Your fingers – for me this is the worst part. Once my finger was so cold I couldn’t even tell if I had it on the trigger or not. First, find a pair of those cheap, thin gloves the sell for $1 at Walmart. Put those on along with a hand warmer in the palm of your hand. If you are a Droid user, you will want to cut a very small hole in the pointer finger. (If your a lefty then cut the whole in the right mitten) If you do not do this you can forget about #9 because the phones respond to body heat rather than pressure. The mittens which open up to gloves with the finger tips cut-off are next. Place a pair of warmers on the inside of the mittens as far to the top as possible. Then another on the other side of the mitten. part to keep the top of your hands/fingers warm. a cloth pair of gloves then put the mitten/gloves on top. Don’t forget that your food pack is also there to help keep your hands warm.
9. Boredom – If you have one, take your smart phone along. If not, find something similar that you can silence. I have learned so much about my Droid X just from sitting out in the bales. And, have gotten some amazing photos. Even a phone that is textable can keep you entertained. My pesky good-hearted, brother-in-law likes to take goofy pics of himself and send them to us all. And, don’t worry, as long as you remember to keep scanning the area you won’t miss any deer.
10. Buy some depends. Just remember to stash a plastic sack in the bathroom before you leave and some newspapers in the garage next to the garbage can. Run right in claiming you have to pee and remove your business, place in the sack put inside your hooded sweatshirt and head for the garage where you will drop it into the garbage can.
And, presto you just had yourself a relaxing time with God and nature without kids screaming, fighting or asking you to do 10 different things at once. It helps you re-center and re-focus.
If you have any ideas for future Top Ten’s, by all means share!
Have a great day!!
P.S. I’m joking about number 10 but I had you going didn’t I?? Come on, admit it, you were falling for it and thought I was crazy. Right? Love it! Gotcha!
P.S.S You might be a tiny bit correct about the being crazy part…but just a bit!